Well that’s right folks, this is going to be an emotional post! It’s something I’ve been thinking about recently and today it was brought home in a rather emotional way for me. I absolutely hate good byes. Even though I know the people I have said goodbye to are ones I will see again, but still there is pain there. Why I hear you ask?
It really struck me this evening that the people I was saying goodbye to are family members that I have never met before. They have been visiting us all here in Northern Ireland for a week. Every one of us has bonded and drawn closer to each other in a very profound and meaningful way. This would be alright and something which one would not have to get too emotional over. However, something much more profound has occurred.
The more I thought about it today the more I asked myself; where does my love go? Certainly my faith…yes absolutely my friends, but perhaps the biggest avenue for my love is my family. I am tremendously blessed beyond measure that I have a family that I can love and that love me. When I say family, I don’t just mean the immediate parents and siblings…I don’t even just mean cousins, aunties, uncles, grandparents…I don’t even mean great uncles or aunts, second cousins, distant relatives etc. I am blessed in that I meet people that I am told are relatives and that is all there is too it. This week was a particular blessing to celebrate a great uncles 90th birthday and to spend time with these family members I had not met before.
Today we spent much time as a collection of family members having a day out together. I love photographing such days. Part of me enjoys my almost natural role in the background but I genuinely love being able to photograph such moments from the background. The reason for this is because when you do so, when others are not aware that they are being photographed then you see them as they truly are; without pretences or acts. When you photograph your family in such a way then you see how truly beautiful they are; individually and collectively.
My family are my heart. When I meet new family members and spend time with them it is almost like finding new parts to your heart. The more family you find the more complete your heart becomes. Certainly that is true of me. Then when you have to say goodbye, it is almost like that piece of your heart which you have discovered and grown to love has to leave you. It is almost painful…no, it is painful. Even though I know we shall meet again I think perhaps the pain which is felt can almost be considered selfish because you just want your heart to be complete once more…
Alas for now, we must say goodbye, if but only for a little while. The good news however is that for those new beloved family members my heart goes with you wherever you go. You are my heart and all my love goes with you.